Friday, December 30, 2011

carla gugino as an angel. yeah, i'll buy that

Uploaded with

(Or, for that matter, as a mermaid)


Wow. How'd I miss this?

In Playboy’s quest to stay relevant, the softcore porn company has shot a nude TRON pictorial to celebrate the sweet, sweet “release” of TRON: Legacy

God I miss Helmut Newton

Thursday, December 29, 2011

What an interesting question...

Somebody found one of my other blogs by Googling

how many a list women have appeared nude in films

They didn't find what they were looking for there but it got me wondering:

Who are we placing on the a list? Well, according to Wikipedia--and when are they wrong?--

The A-list is part of a larger guide called The Hot List that has become an industry-standard guide in Hollywood.

Who knew? There actually is an a list; it's not just a turn of phrase. Which leads us of course to, who's on it, and in turn...have they? Well, here's the list as of last year (this year's isn't out):

10. Penelope Cruz. Honestly a bit of a surprise here. Although she's curvy; sexy and beautiful and all that, she hasn't had any big hit movies in the last few years.

I mean other than the Pirates sequel, which wouldn't have been released when the list was made.

But more importantly...Q: Has she? A: Yes, yes she has, though I don't think I've seen any of the films in which she did.

9. Angelina Jolie. No surprise here, she's pretty much got the body everybody wants (one way or the other). Although, her box office has been up (Salt) and down (The Tourist) lately. But has she?


8. Nicole Kidman.

Sort of like Penelope Cruz, and no I wasn't thinking of the Tom connection when I said that. >But in the sense that yes, she's a good looking woman (and can give a good performance), but...two of her last three films were box office disasters.

But, more to the point, yes she has all right, and to illustrate this point I point you to the butt at right.

7. Scarlett Johanssen. Let's be candid. It's not Scarlett Johansson who's on the a list, it's her 34-C tits.

And thus far, she's chosen not to expose them to a moving picture camera. Although there were of course those naked pictures that "leaked" much to her "shock."

6. Meryl Streep. All I can say about this one is, all right for the older ladies. And as far as I she know, she hasn't.

5. Keira Knightley. I think it could be argued that, if you go strictly by the bone structure of the face, Knightley is the most good-looking woman in the world.

Size of breasts and overall curviness of figure brings my general desire to see her undressed down a bit (I feel I should point out, that's a statement of personal preference, not a general comment).

But, what a great face. Oh, and yes.

4. Cameron Diaz. I think I'm on the record as not understanding why Cameron Diaz is a big star. But, people do seem to like to go to her movies, so whadaI know. And you ask: Has she? And the answer is...not really.

She doesn't seem to like wearing many clothes in her movies, but she still insists on wearing some.

3. Kate Winslet. Let me see here, Winslet, Winslet...has Kate Winslet appeared nude in any films?

--I'm kidding of course, she is a role model for actresses in how you can "get your kit off," as they say in the UK, and still have a more-than-respectable career. Also a role model in giving a nice "up yours" to anyone who has ever thought she was "too big" at any time. Ever.

2. Julia Roberts.

Like Diaz, exactly why she is such a big star as she is escapes me (though oddly, I liked the film in which they appeared together). But her films do keep scoring at the box office (with the recent exception of Larry Crowne).

Also like Diaz, no, she really hasn't.

1. Reese Witherspoon. Sometimes I find Witherspoon very sexy. Other times, though, she looks like a monster to me (it's the chin). Maybe that's why the recent film I most liked of hers was Monsters Vs. Aliens.

Monsters didn't do as well at the box office as I would've liked; on the other hand How Do You Know bombed like it deserved to bomb. Water For Elephants (which I haven't seen) seems to have done all right, though. Oh, and as you see above, yes she has, or rather yes she did.

Instead of the likes of Kidman and Winslet, Witherspoon seems to be following in the footsteps of Jamie Lee Curtis and Uma Thurman. The first two started their careers doing nudity and have basically never stopped.

Curtis, Thurman and now Witherspoon, however, on the way up, would do nudity. But once they started getting critical acclaim and box-office success (in whatever order), they've kept dearly buttoned up.

And again, that's an observation, not a judgement.

Monday, December 26, 2011

It has a standard?

Lindsay Lohan Playboy Photos Outselling Pamela Anderson, Tara Reid Issues

Lohan’s issue is reportedly expected to exceed sales figures for the January 2011 issue by Pamela Anderson and the January 2010 issue by Tara Reid.

Anderson posed completely unclothed while Reid appeared only partially unclothed.

Reid’s issue sold well because of fascinating over her stomach. Reid suffered stomach scars following a botched 2004 liposuction procedure.

Anderson has yet to comment about Lohan’s spread. But other former Playboy models have been highly critical, some telling news that Lohan’s spread is lowering the standard for the publication.

Hard to argue with, really

If I didn't know better, I'd SWEAR...

...they were trying to imply something.

The nude body is nothing to be ashamed of.

Sunday, December 25, 2011

Is it wrong that I'm thinking that's an awfully Jewish nose for such a Christmas pic?

Does it help if I remind you I like a slightly more prominent nose, and find this woman very sexy?

Tuesday, December 20, 2011


sue perkins nude Pictures, Images and Photos

Private School Internationale (or why the Germans are better than the Turks)

In Germany, they don't fuck around as to what the selling point of a video is. Just about the only thing anybody associates with the Private School movie is the topless horseback riding scene, so they put 'em (excuse me...put the scene) right on the cover.

In Turkey, on the other hand, they put a woman who doesn't appear anywhere in the movie (in Daisy Dukes yet) on the poster.

Not only that, but they take a woman who does appear in the movie and photoshop her till...well, might I remind you, this is what Phoebe Cates looked like in the early '80s:

Compare that definition of nubility to the divorced-from-all-humanity photo on this poster.

Sunday, December 18, 2011

Dana Delany has wonderful legs

Three questions, two answers

Q: Why are Diana and the Catwoman locked in a death-duel?

A: Who cares?

Q: And what is..."The Fist of Flame?"

A: Um...

Q: Who is this artist?

A: ?

Saturday, December 17, 2011

Friday, December 16, 2011

Here's the thing: She's right, Lohan's spread sucks. But...

So there's this woman named Hope Dworaczyk, a Playmate.

In fact a Playmate of the Year.

She's being quoted as saying of Lindsay Lohan's Playboy layout,
"I saw that spread ... and I was not impressed."

She added, "I just feel like if I would have known I was doing a Playboy shoot, I would have worked out more maybe."

Lohan's pics don't suck because she didn't "work out more maybe." Indeed the fact that she doesn't look like she's been sticking her finger down her throat for the past few months is one of the only things that doesn't suck about them.

Why do I think they sucked? I think because by doing most of them "as" Marilyn Monroe, Lohan takes away the idea of the nude human figure as a person uncovered. It's like my complaint about the '90s Madonna nudes--

--as opposed to the pre-fame ones.

I like the earlier Madonna pictures because in them, she looks like a real grown-up; in the later ones she looks fake and strangely less mature than in those taken when she was younger and couldn't know what life was going to bring her.

Similarly, Lohan doesn't look like she's showing us the woman that, for better or for worse, she has become. She looks like she's a little girl (and I mean that without the pedophiliac connotation) playing undress-up.

Oh, and just one other thing, Miss Dworaczyk: Once a woman has hit her teens, we should never be able to see her ribs again.