One can never have too much Kate Winslet.

For those of you playing at home, this is what Jenny McCarthy looks like now naked

Still hot, but I figure, almost no original parts.

Come home to me, Courtney

The history of '80s film in topless women

How many of them can you name?

Two Black Playboy Playmates

Anne-Marie Fox, Miss February 1982.  An additional consequence of my having entered puberty in the '80s is that the headband and leg warmers look really works for me.

Venice Kong, Miss September 1985

nude female

Statuette II by *TonyAldridge on deviantART

I don't know you, but I love you

Actually, I'll be damned if Brit doesn't look really, really good.

And for the record, I'm talking about her face here more than her boobs.

Which speak for themselves.

She makes me want to touch her face like an old woman, "Oy!  Such a pretty face..."

Sweetheart, you look like a Barbie doll, and I don't mean that in a good way

Ah Emma, Emma, Emma...

That sound you hear is my brain cooking like it was a burger on a grill

Here's a question for which to ponder...

Exactly what is it that separates Lindsey Lohan from any other Girl Gone Wild?

Why, if I didn't know better, I'd say those were hips

But I'm an American, so of course I don't believe women have those.

I *Knew* There Was a Reason Why I Found Them So Attractive

Kristen Stewart is the highest-paid actress in Hollywood


Behind her in the top five are to be found Cameron Diaz, Sandra Bullock, Angelina Jolie and Charlize Theron.

Personally I find her interesting in a similar way to which I once found Megan Fox interesting.

Which is to say, there seems to be a disconnect between the headline and the fine print.

She may also bear a resemblance to Megan Fox because in still photos she looks great, but she can't really move.

I'm absolutely sure that's Megan Fox's problem--more so than ever after catching some of Transformers 2--(I'm afraid to even try to watch Jonah Hex, because I like the comic), but I haven't seen enough of Stewart yet to say.

(Stewart was, it must be admitted, pretty good in the Runaways movie)

(She also makes a darned good blonde)

I do, however, have the oddest feeling that she would look good in a Spider-Man costume...

Diaz, meanwhile, was my least-favorite "Angel."

And Bullock's barely even on my radar (sorry, Sandy).

Finding Jolie sexy always makes me feel common but it's undeniable she does have my favorite kind of woman's shape.

Not that Charlize Theron's shape is something that I loathe...

 In the bottom five (of the top 10), we find Julia Roberts, Sarah Jessica Parker, Meryl Streep, Kristen Wiig, and Jennifer Aniston.

I suppose I'll go on the record here, if I haven't before, as saying that I really don't get the whole Julia Roberts...thing.

As for Sarah Jessica Parker, for my money the sexiest of the Sex & the City gals has always been, is, and will remain Kim Cattrall.

But if I had a daughter, I'd be much happier if she took Pixar's Eva (-a) as her heroine than any of those "ladies."

I have nothing to say about Meryl Streep (except that you're telling me she makes less than Parker?  That can't be right).

Kristen Wiig's (seen here with Emma Stone, who does not make a good blonde) presence on the list is a bit of a surprise, I mean I knew Bridesmaids had made her hot, but I didn't realize it had made her that hot.

And about Bridesmaids...I find that I like it a lot better in theory than I actually did onscreen.

I like the theory of, as Rotten Tomatoes put it,

a female-driven comedy that refuses to be boxed in

I've even written one or two in my time, and I'm glad, as an idea, that this one was so successful.

But when it comes to actually seeing it...well, let me put it this way:

I don't like movies where men go around shitting in the street and in sinks.  Imagine how I feel about one where women do.

I've thought she was good in other things, though, like Drew Barrymore's Whip It and even the MacGruber movie.  I also felt she was particularly hot in Paul, of all things.  Oh yes, and she's done some nice vocal work in animated films like How To Train Your Dragon.

I hope she's enjoying her success.  But Bridesmaids?  I just didn't feel it.  Sorry.

Finally, Jennifer Aniston.  I still maintain that somewhere within that cover girl there actually is an actress, she just may not always choose the best opportunities for proving that.

On a completely different level, yes of course she's a sexy, good-looking woman.

But she probably needs to hurry up and show her full-frontal naked body in a movie soon, before people stop wanting to see it.

Or it stops being something she wants to have people see.

I've asked it before, and I'll ask it again:

Who could not like Mary Louise Parker?

Yes, she's right.

WCT: Can you talk a bit about your movie Take This Waltz? Was it hard to convince you to go naked in the film?

Sarah Silverman: No. I was so honored that Sarah Polley wanted me for this part and so excited to get to work with her. She called me after I signed on to ask if I was going to be comfortable with this and that it was very important to her. I figured who am I to blow the chance to do something real? I trusted her completely. And, look: In the end it's not a big deal. It's just a body, exactly what you'd expect.

She's right. That's actually one of the things that's so good about the scene in question.

It's not about Silverman or the other women in the scene being hot chicks (which some of them are), it's just about them being women with women's bodies.

I mean personally, I think Silverman looks a lot more exciting in this picture...

Now, let us rejoice.

The glory hath returned! ...and you know...

...it's really unfair. How am I supposed not to do the "bend over, I'll drive you home" joke when there are pictures of Keeley Hazell like this?

jennifer love has some of the best cleavage in the world

Or has anybody already noticed that?

Goddamn you, Kim Kardashian

I mean, I think she's an inexplicably famous bimbo--and a terrible image for young women.  And yet, and yet, put her in a swimsuit or less, and my resolve is quickly blown.

Let's have a little Kelly n Kate tonite....

Yes, that seems a very good idea.

Honestly: The "Species" movies are ridiculous, but...